Father
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This is my father’s world
There’s something about the entire northeast being covered in a blanket of snow, everything frozen, everyone shoveling their way out, everyone subject to subfreezing conditions, everyone maneuvering through snow and ice, and everyone being exposed to the way the sun makes the snow sparkle and the ice sickles glisten – it gives me peace. This Continue reading
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All the Time
Sigh. For me, anxiety comes when I see myself not get it right again. When I see I’m still struggling. When it takes longer than I want. I’ve started to remind myself there is time. Time is one thing I am not short on – Jesus has given me an eternity. It’s a little bit Continue reading
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Faithful when we are not
Y’all there’s gonna be no beating around the bush in this post: Us church people have too high a view of the affect of our sin on God. My search in Scripture for evidence that God can’t be in the presence of sin comes up disappointingly empty. Instead I find countless times where God is Continue reading
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Yet
I heard I was God’s enemy.Yet God reconciled His enemies to Himself. May we accept the standing of “child.”I heard God can’t tolerate sin.Yet He carried the sin of the world.May we one day tolerate His holiness.I heard my sin separates me from God.Yet He says nothing will snatch His children from His hand.May we Continue reading
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nice sentiments
Sometimes I wonder:Is it just a nice sentimentthat God calls me His child?I don’t doubt that God loves me,I often doubt His love is effective. Is me being “daughter” more than a hollow privilege?Why would a Father send a Spirit to comfort a child in a body?Why do we celebrate His Son’s broken body while Continue reading
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With Me
I knowto be adopted by a sovereign Godat the cost of His own Sonleaves no room for reasonable doubtthat I am chosen,protected,and beloved.I knowto be brought into God’s family means the lies I heardfor so long -the ones I recitedto make sense of chaos -no longer apply.I have agencyto think differently,to feel differently,to choose differently. Continue reading
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Take Me In
The Lord took me in.I asked him, “Why?”He said, “Because you’re my child”I scoffed – like Sarah.It was a nice sentiment, I thought. But He was persistentHe held me When I said “I’m fine.”He bandaged me When I said “there’s worse off.”He pursued meWhen I said “I’m not going far.”I asked “why?”He said, “because you’re Continue reading
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(re)parenting
About a year ago I read an interview where someone said that the Bible only has a few passages that speak directly to how to raise kids. They said the area of parenting styles is one (mostly) of personal freedom for Christians. While I agree with this and need to be reminded of this often, Continue reading
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I will dare
I will look into Your eyesand I will dare to tell Youthe truth:I’m scaredto just behere with You.Because then, I think, You might be unimpressed. You might grow impatient.You might lose interest. You might leave.I’ve wanted to be more-to pleaseto self-improveto be needed. But I’m confused.Disappointed.I thought this washow to be with You. When it’s Continue reading
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Father(s)
You were the skin and bones of my theologybefore I knew how to read the Word.The strong hand I held when my own body felt vulnerable. You were the mouththat laughed and uttered words of shamethat left me confused at how I could be wonderfully madeand still somehow not good enough. You were the armsI Continue reading
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Asking the Father
I love (and sometimes really dislike) how my kids are unafraid to ask me for unreasonable things, cry when I say “no,” and then come to me for comfort. Their tears aren’t toward me personally, though it may feel like it to them and myself for a time. Their tears are really for the loss Continue reading
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Building Something New
“What’s that guy doing?” he asked in his drawn out 2 year old voice. “He’s using a jack hammer to break up the street,” I answered. “But whyyyy?” came the infamous question from the back of the car. “Because sometimes,” I said with a catch in my voice, “you have to break down old things Continue reading
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A Child
Her warm body nestled into mine. My arm resting over her waist. Her hand placed on my arm. My nose pressed against her head breathing in the smell of her freshly washed hair. My wiggly, expressive, imaginative girl relaxed and resting beside me. I wish it were that easy to trust. I wish it were Continue reading
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Open to Heaven
In asking for heaven on earth we are, like Jesus in Gethsemane or the saints in Hebrews 11, asking for something we may not receive in the way or timing we want. Yet we are told to ask none the less. “May your Kingdom come soon. May your will be done on earth, as it Continue reading
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Sit With Me
“That’s called empathy,” I told my then three year old as I pointed to Frog sitting on the porch next to Toad who was feeling sad about never having got a letter. Frog and Toad Are Friends: The Letter is probably my favorite Frog and Toad story and I was trying to reign in my Continue reading
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More than word on a page
“I luv you. And you luv me.” I was around 6, I think. I sat next to Grandma’s little lamp with a red pen and a piece of scrap paper. I wanted to write a note to Mom and Dad about how I loved them and was so happy and grateful for them. I struggled Continue reading
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Highways
“I run to the FatherI fall into graceI’m done with the hidingNo reason to waitMy heart needs a surgeonMy soul needs a friendSo I’ll run to the FatherAgain and againAnd again and again“ ~ Run To The Father, Matt Maher “Blessed are those whose strength is in you, in whose heart are the highways to Continue reading
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Safe
“Keep me safe,” he said as he cuddled deeper into the blankets next to me. His chubby two year old hand rested on mine. Sometimes loving him means washing his blue sippy cups, giving him space to make mistakes, and showing him again how to be kind to his sister. And sometimes loving him means Continue reading
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Good Intentions
“As we try to believe what is not meant to be understood will You help us to trust Your intentions for us are still good. ‘Cause You laid down Your life and You suffered like I never could” ⁃ Always Good, Andrew Peterson I think doubting his father’s intentions was why the prodigal son in Continue reading
The Worth Of Knowing 