poem
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The Fence: A Poem on Salvation and Doubt
They say you’re either for or against;There’s no room for sitting on the fence. What about when I can’t enjoy my sin,But I don’t trust God – where’s he been?When my mind is consumed with doubtI plead to God for a way out. I’m waiting on the fence. All I hear is silence. The pastor… Continue reading
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Withness
The thing with sharing about myself is thatno one really gets to see meuntil I know how they will hold me with me.Their questions and commentsabout my story or struggleare well-meaning. I just know sometimescomments are used subconsciouslyto create distancebetween my story and themselves. Discomfort is hard. Sometimes people offer bandaidsto help themselves feel better.… Continue reading
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Stolen Beauty
It’s there when a child lets out a final sighTheir tired body melts into their mom’s arms.It’s in the glow of a sunset in the skyGracing the horizon with intense colors. It’s in conversations, where in the mind’s eye,Lively thoughts dance effortlessly between us. It’s there when an old, happy couple walk byHand in wrinkled… Continue reading
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Disloyal Hope
Hope fills me like air in a balloon. The possibilities swell inside me. A smile’s on my face but I know this tuneAnd that in the end I will not float free.I bounce around all light and cheery.While wishing I were one or the other -Free as a bird or tethered securelyTo avoid my ending… Continue reading
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Let’s Not Be Sorry Anymore
I feel anxious.I feel overwhelmed.I feel confused.But I have learnedI am not alone,I am brave,and I am not sorry for difficult things.They are challenges. They are opportunities. They are windowsto see God.When I fail,He is there. When I succeed,He is there. The end is always the same- God with me. I am not sorry for… Continue reading
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Mercy Truimphs
When my curiosity runs dry and I’ve named my anger “righteous” the one thing that can keep my heart from growing hard is looking into the perfect Word and seeing perfect righteousness as my reflection. It stops me in my self confident tracks. Because I know. I know that’s not my goodness. But it also… Continue reading
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Prayer to the Shepherd
Gather the scattered.Bind up the injured.Strengthen the weak.Anoint us in the valleyand let Your Word light the way. Satisfy us with the Bread of Lifein the midst of our enemies. Fill our cups to overflowingwith Your presence.In the wilderness – the in between – let us find our home in You.Be our good Shepherd. “I… Continue reading
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Called
I hear it now:Your call to obedianceis always an invitationto relationship. Apart from the VineI can do nothing. But the Vine’s ability is made evidentin my inability aswe abide. Me in You. You in Me. Your ability running through me.Your fruit on my limbs. You call me to obey. And You call me to witness… Continue reading
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One Day
One day there will be no space between us. No downcast eyes. No attempt to hide parts of myself.No hesitancy in affection. No restricting hope with fear of disappointment. No brokenness pieced together. Only every broken thing made new. No shadows. Only joyful fullness. No more thirst. Only the satisfying quenching of it. You abiding… Continue reading
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With Me
I knowto be adopted by a sovereign Godat the cost of His own Sonleaves no room for reasonable doubtthat I am chosen,protected,and beloved.I knowto be brought into God’s family means the lies I heardfor so long -the ones I recitedto make sense of chaos -no longer apply.I have agencyto think differently,to feel differently,to choose differently.… Continue reading
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Take Me In
The Lord took me in.I asked him, “Why?”He said, “Because you’re my child”I scoffed – like Sarah.It was a nice sentiment, I thought. But He was persistentHe held me When I said “I’m fine.”He bandaged me When I said “there’s worse off.”He pursued meWhen I said “I’m not going far.”I asked “why?”He said, “because you’re… Continue reading
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The Edge of Goodness
While in the wildernessI refused to enter the pleasant placesYou prepared for me. I refused to obey the Lord. In another land,my body was familiar with the ache of being controlled.My heart was comfortedby the predictable disappointmentof half-truths.But Your promises were my hope.And then, joyous day,You brought me out of that place. And now I… Continue reading
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I will dare
I will look into Your eyesand I will dare to tell Youthe truth:I’m scaredto just behere with You.Because then, I think, You might be unimpressed. You might grow impatient.You might lose interest. You might leave.I’ve wanted to be more-to pleaseto self-improveto be needed. But I’m confused.Disappointed.I thought this washow to be with You. When it’s… Continue reading
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My Heart
Carefully, firmly you remove the bush of thorns and buds, potential for pain and beauty, from the small pot now unnecessary means of confinement that stunted it’s growth. We examine the roots, stems, leaves. You hold it with understanding, pointing out the potential for growth that will be unhindered. We make room in the earth… Continue reading
The Worth Of Knowing 